“Hey… Are you all right?”
When she did not respond, I rested the bowl in my lap and waited. Waving a hand in front of her face, I did not know what else to do. She did not respond to such an action either.
“Alice… dear.”
With that, her frozen gaze finally broke. She slowly turned her eyes to me, still wide and fearful, but at the same time, wide and curious as to why I called for her. Quickly after I caught her attention, her eyes dropped to the food on my lap.
“Are you all right?” I repeated my question. However, even though I had her attention now, her transfixion shifted to the porridge. I caught sight of the subtle twitch of her mouth, a soft smack of her lips, as her mouth moistened even more.
“Can you sit up more, please?”
It did not seem like any of my words were reaching her. I recalled how I managed to attract her attention earlier.
“Alice.”
Alice glanced up. But, just as quickly, her eyes fell back down while I was speechless at how effectively her adopted name drew her eyes. Perhaps a little cruel, I dropped the porridge down between my legs, out of sight, and called her name again. This time, when she glanced up, she had nothing else to return to. I had her full attention.
“Dear, are you able to sit up? So that I can feed you easier.”
She continued to stare at me in utter confusion. It did not seem like I was making any sense to her. Her curious stare donned on a more frightened look, her brows furrowed. Some sort of baffled or irritated curiosity.
I felt guilty right away, and brought back up the food. Scooping a spoonful of porridge, I blew on it briefly and brought it to her mouth. Alice tilted up her chin to meet the spoon, quite weakly raising her head to engulf the entire bite of food. Then she sunk back down, gently tugging the spoon and my hand with her, as I felt her gulp down the porridge without chewing. Immediate satisfaction lit across her face as she closed her eyes and puckered her lips, sucking the spoon like a baby. I watched and waited for her to eventually release it, letting me pull it out and scoop another bite. Alice followed it carefully, the spoon becoming the new object of transfixion for her. Spoon after spoon, her eyes ran back and forth until I ran out. Setting the spoon in the empty bowl and tilting it towards her, she recognised what this meant, and sunk back, closing her eyes, and apparently falling asleep.