The rain gradually picked back up again as our streetcar rode through the countryside. I stayed in the carriage, not in the mood to get any more wet today. If it had just started, I would not mind standing on the bridge. But the carriage was mostly empty, so I was not reserved about taking a seat. Once Jane departed at her stop, I was the only one left on the tram.
Without anyone watching me, I thought about what to say. What I had said. There wasn’t actually anything to show. Alice was still missing. That took off some weight, needing to introduce her to Jane. Or, maybe it wouldn’t be so great. Maybe I would just look like I was going mental. I didn’t fancy that.
Although I made a promise to her, I didn’t really feel like talking about Alice today. I was hoping I would have some time to think about it. Gather my thoughts together so I made some sense to her. It did not occur to me she would try and come over right away.
A voice interrupted me as the tram driver announced my stop.
Now that I was on the clock, I cannot imagine for a second the conversation would not be messy. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and let a wave of misty air pass through me, rousing my hair. Walking down the fields, towards the forest, I got to work, seriously considering what I should say. How far back do I want to go? Just the day I met Alice? Depends how long Jane wanted to listen, I suppose.
And how should I put it? I had a girl visiting my cottage for a while and she suddenly stopped showing up. Or I could divulge a little more, and say she is a little suspicious. Alice is mute, so it’s not like she could say the contrary. Although, she could still beg to differ using her expressions or head shaking. Would she go so far to do that? I suppose in this first bout she would not be here to argue the contrary.
What about her would make her suspicious then? Simply because she wouldn’t talk? Maybe it was sufficient enough to say there’s a strange, mute girl visiting me every so often. That way, Alice doesn’t need to be there for it to make any sense. How different is that from the story I told Sophia?
No, I can’t do that. That was still a lie. Probably the best thing I could do is just tell Jane the truth. To trust her with it. I cannot manage all these different narratives any longer. She did have a tendency to ramble what’s on her mind, but she is a good friend. Perhaps I should treat her less as a child. She’s managed to clue in this much without me telling her.
I didn’t have much time to myself. Soon enough, I heard Jane’s distant voice behind me. Turning around, I saw her hurrying down the path as fast as she could in her dress. She held her arms close to her chest, gripping the umbrella as it swayed side to side behind her, flying like a sail.
“Wait for me, dear!”
“Hey! Take care!” I shouted back. “It’s slippery here! I’m not going anywhere!”
Jane abruptly slowed down, almost slipping just as I said that. She maintained her balance and quickly paced towards me. “Sorry, dear.”
Once she joined my side, I continued forward. Jane brushed off some droplets of rain on her dress. “Honestly, you needn’t rush here like that.”
“I’d feel more at ease if I did,” she replied. “It’s no trouble.”
Once we were in the forest, the steady rain faded away to erratic drum beats dribbling big splashes of rainwater onto our umbrellas. I shook mine off to the side and retracted it, not minding the rain this deep under the shade. “Better than slipping.”
“I haven’t slipped in ages! It’s fineee.”
“Not if you’re in a hurry, it won’t,” I reminded. Then, I clammed up, realising I was harping over the same things as before. “Anyways…”
But I did not continue. I did not know what to say. How I should start our discussion. We walked silently for a bit.
Eventually, Jane spoke for me, starting off slow. “You were going to tell me something…? Or…? Would—”
“Well—” I accidentally interrupted her as she paused.
“Go ahead,” she encouraged.
“No, sorry. You were saying?”
“Oh, well… would you rather wait until we’re at the cottage?”
“Let’s settle down first, if we could.”
“Right, that’s fine.”
“I would like to put my food away.”
“Mhmm.”
“And I need some time to think,” I admitted.
“Take your time. I’m listening.”
Coming up to the clearing, I noticed something at the door of the cottage and stopped. Jane looked back at me.
“What is it? Did you forget something?”
There was something laid across the steps to the door. It looked like a crumple of cloth, a crumpled up bed sheet, its white colour now darkened and beige, as if it had been sitting out in the rain all day. However, its form was uncanny. The way it stretched across the steps would raise the hairs on anybody’s arms. Strands of string covered this crumple of cloth, like the head of a mop, except it was a golden, albeit a muted golden, colour.
“Elisa…?” Jane glanced into the clearing, then back to me. “Is something wrong?”
Gathering myself together, drawing in my arms and securing my basket, I hurried forward, brushing past Jane. “Hang on…”
As I got closer, I immediately recognised what I was looking at. The crumpled-up shape did not move as I approached, lying there motionlessly, in an awkward and horrifying manner. Stopping just before the heap, I held my breath. Time slowed to a stop, countless seconds flying by as the sight burned itself into my memory. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
“Wait, what?” I heard Jane’s dumbfounded exclamation behind me. She finally saw what I saw.